I’ve had a bad week. I won’t bore you with the details, but let’s just say that life has kicked me in the gut a few too many times and left me feeling pretty down. When I got in from work the other night, I was fed up and in need of some self-care so I ordered a Chinese, put Gossip Girl on and had a cuddle with James.
In general, I don’t let life get me down. I hate feeling negative and out of control, so I do everything I can to turn a bad day into a good one. However, when shitty days like this do happen, they put my positive attitude to life to the test.
It’s not an easy thing to do because negativity is like a disease. It can eat at you and excuse the cliché but finding the light at the end of the tunnel is often really difficult.
My journey from a dramatic 15 year old to a level-headed 23 year old has had a lot to do with how I react to negativity, so I would like to share with you some of the lessons I’ve learned along the way.
You can’t control everything
As a self-confessed control freak, I find the idea of something happening without my say-so really uncomfortable. I like things to happen a certain way (my way) and when they don’t it’s difficult for me to accept.
However, the best piece of advice I’ve been given is that the only thing you can control in any situation is how you respond to it. Someone recently broke my beloved scooter when they tried to steal it and now it’s unusable. That’s really effing annoying. However, instead of being angry, I chose not to be because I didn’t have to be.
If you stop putting so much emphasis on control and more on reaction, you’re less likely to get so wound up and angry at things that are out of your hands.
Turn it into a learning experience
Instead of getting angry about a situation, take a breath and reflect on what you can learn from it. Easier said than done – granted. But, by viewing everything as an opportunity to grow, you’ll quickly find that you can take on the world because nothing that happens is 100% negative.
Whether it’s having a fall out with your best friend, being dumped by your other half or getting some bad news at work, you can find the good news in everything if you look hard enough.
Negativity is unproductive
Don’t get me wrong, we all need to feel our emotions sometimes. Having a rant/cry/scream is often really therapeutic, but in general, being negative solves nothing.
Spending your evening moaning about your boss might feel good at the time, but that time could be spent doing something else, like finding a new job. While it’s popular (and meme-able) to be a Moaning Myrtle, being a productive bad-ass who looks for solutions rather than problems is ultimately going to be better for you in the long run.
How do you deal with negativity? Let me know in the comments or tweet me @amyjmcdonnell 🐦